


Grandfather Clause

by inahandbasket



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Accidental Incest, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-27
Updated: 2018-11-27
Packaged: 2019-08-30 02:49:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16756417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inahandbasket/pseuds/inahandbasket
Summary: Ianto asks for some stories from Jack about his days as a pilot in the RAF during WWII.  During a story, Ianto figures out that Jack is talking about having had a threesome with people who seem to be his grandparents, and that the timing is suspiciously nine months before his mother's birthday.  He freaks out and they have to find out the truth.





	Grandfather Clause

“Were you really a pilot in World War II?” Ianto asks out of the blue. Jack had just walked into the living room where Ianto is reading a book. Jack had just gotten in from work and was taken aback by the non-sequitur question.

“Yeah. Both times actually. Why?” Jack starts to take off his RAF greatcoat and looks at it while answering Ianto's query. “Don't you believe the coat?” Jack adds with a smirk.

Ianto looks up at Jack. “Not that I don't believe your sartorial choices, but I know that you took the name of an RAF pilot, I just wasn't sure if you actually were a pilot yourself, that is for the RAF, I know you can fly space ships.”

Jack takes a seat on the arm rest of Ianto's chair. “Yeah, I actually served, too. I was an excellent pilot, so I thought I'd use those skills. The first time, I had just taken the name and was using his persona to get what I needed. I had managed to get on an RAF base using his credentials and saying that my listing as killed in action was a clerical error. They had me fly out with a squadron and we got into a couple of skirmishes before I had to leave abruptly.”

“Really? Didn't you feel weird flying out with a bunch of guys who could actually die during these flights while you couldn't.”

“Actually, this was before I became immortal.” Jack looks a little uncomfortable like he wasn't intending to talk about this.

“Oh,” Ianto says, suddenly serious. “So this was before you met the Doctor?”

“Yeah. This was the first time I served. The second time I went through World War II, I took a different name and served a little more under the radar.”

Ianto wants to lighten Jack's mood again. “Tell me about these skirmishes.”

Jack grins again and loses himself in details of dogfights, zooming his hands around to mimic the plane movements he describes. He keeps slightly sliding closer on the arm of the chair so his leg touches Ianto's. Even though he knows what he's doing, Ianto finds himself caught up in the story and the tale of daring do. He puts his hand on Jack's thigh and finds himself unconsciously rubbing and squeezing. 

This does not go unnoticed by Jack. He puts his hand behind Ianto's head and leans in real close. “And just then the German plane came down sharply like this,” and Jack zooms his other hand down and sideways so it dives towards Ianto's lap. At the same time he slides himself down the side of the armrest so Ianto's hand on his thigh is made to slide up and gets to his crotch. He lets out a little moan and leans his head down to Ianto and kisses him lightly. Jack lets his hand that had been the diving plane, find Ianto's cock and is not surprised to find it already partially hard. Ianto moans quietly into his mouth and then pulls back just enough to say against his lips, “And then what happened?”

Jack chuckles. “I got behind him and shot him out of the sky, saving the British Empire.”

Ianto laughs. “My hero.” And he pushes his crotch up against Jack's hand. “I'm sure these stories got you lots of action back then.”

“Yeah, they served me for quite a few years after the war. You'd be surprised how many men and women will have you just because you fought in the war.”

“I don't think I'd be surprised,” Ianto says, and then impatiently pulls Jack's lips back towards his, kissing him fiercely, using his own hand to make sure that Jack is properly excited. “Let me show you how good your stories are. Come on, Captain, show me how strong and heroic you are in the bedroom.”

Jack pulls Ianto up out of the chair and they race to the bedroom.

An hour and a half later, Ianto is starting to fall asleep, sweaty and sticky and pleasantly sore in all the right places. Jack had showed him a new position they hadn't tried before. He hadn't realized that he was that flexible. He feels the bed move as Jack gets up and goes to the bathroom, running the water briefly, and then heading back to the bed. Ianto whines as he feels the warm, damp cloth cleaning up his abdomen and thighs. “Are you falling asleep on me?” Jack asks teasingly.

“Mmhmm,” Ianto answers.

“We haven't even eaten dinner yet. Don't fall asleep on me.”

Ianto rolls over towards Jack and puts a hand behind his neck, pulling him down for a kiss. “What are you going to give me if I stay awake?”

“I can think of something to give you,” Jack teases back. “Something big and hard and just for you.”

“I'm sure it'll be a perfect fit.”

“Slides right in,” Jack lays down on top of Ianto and they rub against each other, prepping for another round.

“Is it just like you remembered, being with a flyboy groupie?”

Jack smiles. “Usually I would get groups, or at least couples with my stories.”

Ianto pouts. “Are you saying just one is a disappointment?”

“No,” Jack says quickly. “I was just bragging.”

Ianto laughs. “Relax, I was just teasing. I like your stories, even the ones that end in orgies. Especially the ones that end in orgies.”

Jack laughs back. “That's good. My favorites were the couples who were already together. It would lead to really intimate threesomes.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, the intimacy between the couple would kind of bleed out and affect their performance with me. There was one couple, probably my favorite just after the war, that really brought me into the feelings between them. She was a little thing, couldn't have been more than five feet two inches, slight and delicate looking, but strong and adventurous. Her name was Bronwyn.”

“That's a Welsh name,” Ianto interrupts.

“Yeah, it was here in Wales actually. What can I say, I've always loved the Welsh.”

Ianto smiles and lets Jack continue. “She had gorgeous blonde hair and was so enthusiastic. And then there was her husband. She had to talk him into it at first, but once he got a load of me, he just couldn't say no.”

Ianto laughs at the playful arrogance. “I'm sure,” he says.

Jack squeezes Ianto, “Hey, don't laugh, it's the truth. Anyway, his name was,” Jack pauses, trying to remember, “Tomos, that was it.” Jack doesn't notice that Ianto has stopped smiling and gone quiet. “Well, Tomos was the opposite of his wife, tall, broad shouldered, and loud, especially in bed,” Jack says jokingly. That's when he notices that Ianto has stiffened up in the arms. “What's wrong?”

“Nothing. Anything else about them that you remember?”

“Tomos had the most beautiful blue eyes, a lot like yours actually.” Jack expects Ianto to be melting into his arms, but is frustrated with more tension. “Ianto? Do you want me to stop? You know I don't need anyone else but you right?”

“Jack,” Ianto sighs, “it's not that.”

“Then what is it? You've gone soft, but tense.”

Ianto sighs with frustration and pushes Jack a little to the side so that he can sit up. “It's stupid, that's all.”

“What?” Jack persists.

“It's just weird, because my grandparents were named Bronwyn and Tomos and fit those general descriptions, but I'm sure it wasn't them.”

Jack sits up now, taking this more seriously. “Oh, I guess I get why you would be out of the mood, but it wouldn't really matter if it was them, right? It would just mean that good taste runs in the family.”

“That's kind of creepy.” Ianto glares at Jack. “But I guess you're right. I don't have any right to even know about who they slept with privately, even if it is kind of weird to think about them sleeping with anyone.”

“They were just people, young once, and adventurous, like you.”

“So, do you think it was actually them?”

Jack runs his hand through his hair. “I honestly don't know. Their last name was Jones, but I'm pretty sure half the Welsh population is named Jones.”

“Do you remember anything else about them?”

“Well, they lived right here in Cardiff. Tomos wasn't able to serve even though he wanted to due to a leg injury that he got working in a factory. He had damaged his knee, right knee.”

“You remember what knee it was?”

“Well,” Jack looks sheepish. “It kind of affected what he could do, favoring his right knee.”

“Oh.” Ianto is quiet again.

“I guess this means that your grandfather also had an injury like that.”

“Yeah,” Ianto replies. “He would talk about how he couldn't fight in the war because of it. I think he always felt like he had to justify himself since all his friends fought.”

“Ianto, I'm serious that it doesn't matter. I slept with a lot of people, and most of them probably became somebody's grandparent. I likely have slept with some of their grandchildren, too. After all, I've been in Cardiff a long time.”

“Okay.” Ianto says shortly.

“You're not going to get over this, are you?”

“You having a threesome with my cute and wholesome grandparents?”

“They were young once, Ianto.” Ianto doesn't say anything, but his eyes move back and forth, and Jack knows that he's figuring something out.

“There's something else, isn't there?”

“It's just, you said this was after the war. When?”

“Just a little while. Let me think. I'd say, 1949.”

“Do you know when in 1949?”

“Let's see, it was warm, she was wearing a sundress that was a little ahead of its time. Must have been summer.” Ianto looks even more upset. “What?”

“Summer of 1949?”

“Yeah, so?”

“So, my mother was born in April of 1950.”

Jack takes a second to figure out what Ianto's saying. “Wait, no, that's not possible. I always keep track of any children. I didn't have any children back then.”

“That you know of!” Ianto yells, clearly starting to freak out. “What if she didn't tell you because she already had a husband and they decided that it didn't matter. They wouldn't ever have to tell the one night stand American!”

“Wait, you said mother! Then the name isn't right. Jones is from your father's side!”

“Both my parents were named Jones. Fifty percent of the Welsh population, remember?” Ianto grouses.

“Your parents had the same last name?”

“It doesn't mean they were related. It's an extremely common name. But we might be related!”

“Ianto,” Jack says and he reaches out to take him in his arms again, but Ianto pulls away. “Please, don't freak out. We really don't know, and it doesn't matter either way.”

“Doesn't matter!” Ianto screams.

“Ianto, even if it were true, we didn't have any familial relationship. I didn't know you as a child, and we're not going to be breeding, so it doesn't matter.”

“It's incest, Jack!” Ianto, suddenly realizing that he's still naked and in bed with someone who could turn out to be his grandfather, jumps out of bed and starts pulling on clothes.

“It's not a big deal because it doesn't change anything, Ianto. Like I said, we didn't have any sort of relationship before hand and we're not going to be making babies, so there aren't any consequences. It'll be okay, please, Ianto, please calm down.”

Jack has followed Ianto out of the bed and tries to calm him down, but Ianto won't tolerate any physical touch and is too panicked to put his clothes on properly. He tries to speak, but it's all muffled as he's stuck inside his pullover shirt.

“What?” Jack asks, reaching up to pull the shirt down over Ianto's head. Ianto immediately backs out of reach once he's free.

“I said that we're getting a blood test immediately. Owen's going to settle this.”

“You want to call in Owen tonight to do a blood test?”

“He's probably at the pub by now, so maybe in the morning instead. I'll text him to get him to come in a little early to get it done before the others get in.”

“Ianto, it's not necessary.”

“Yes, it is!” He screams, his voice getting very high. “And you need to go. You're not staying here tonight.”

“I figured that,” Jack grumbles. “Look, Ianto, we'll work this out. Just try not to panic, okay?”

“Please go.”

“Fine,” Jack says curtly, pulling on the rest of his clothes. “See if I ever tell you any World War II stories again.”

“Please don't, I just can't take it.”

Jack starts to walk out in a huff, then catches himself before he leaves the flat. “Ianto, I know that you don't mean this and that you're just panicking, and that whatever it turns out, we'll work through it.”

“I don't think so, Jack,” Ianto says, quietly and much more calmly. “I don't see how we could get through this.”

“Ianto,” Jack starts to choke up. “I can't lose you.”

Ianto is softened by Jack's sudden confession. “I'll see you in Owen's lab in the morning and we'll talk about it when we get the results.”

“Okay,” Jack replies, and he leaves quietly.

Jack doesn't sleep that night. He stays up in the Hub, trying to stay busy, but he can't help but think about Ianto leaving him because he had sex with a great couple sixty years ago. If he had ever known this could happen, he would have gladly given up that night of fun, or would he? He starts to think about it and realizes that there is a real possibility that he could be Ianto's biological grandfather. If he hadn't been with them, then Ianto might not even exist, and he couldn't bear that. And how does he feel about the possibility of being Ianto's grandfather. Ianto wasn't wrong that it would be incest, but he also wasn't wrong that it shouldn't really change their relationship. It's not like he had a familial relationship with him or ever knew him as a child or raised him. He could get over it, but would Ianto? Is he going to leave him? Then it wouldn't matter whether or not he ever had sex with them because Ianto either wouldn't have been born or he won't be with him. There's no win.

Jack has a couple drinks around four in the morning.

Ianto shows up at seven, with Owen in tow. Apparently he picked him up in order to make sure he came in early, but he doesn't seem to have been fully briefed on the situation.

“What the fuck's going on, Jack?” Owen calls out as soon as he sees Jack standing at his office door.

“You're just doing us a favor, okay?”

“What is this bullshit about blood tests?”

“You're just going to do some DNA sequencing. I can interpret the results.”

“Like hell, I need to know any medical problems. Now, Ianto is acting all cagey, so I'm betting that you gave him an STI, and he's too embarrassed to say so.”

“Shit,” Ianto pipes in. “We're going to have to tell him.”

“No, I can do the blood test just fine. It's not that complicated.” Jack grabs Ianto and starts to pull him towards the medical bay.

“No,” Owen physically steps in the way. “Ianto is my patient, and I need to know what's going on. Seriously, guys, I won't tell anyone, I maintain confidentiality. I won't make fun of you for whatever space alien STI he's infected you with.”

“It's not an STI,” Ianto says.

“Really?” Owen asks disbelievingly. “He hasn't given you anything that he got from a space hooker.”

Indignantly, Jack says, “I never pay for sex!”

“Oh, you're too good to use a professional, are you?” Owen retorts.

Ianto answers for him, “No, it's just a point of pride with him that even prostitutes will sleep with him for free. He doesn't have to pay for sex.”

“Oh, that's bullshit,” Owen replies.

“It is not!” Jack yells.

“It doesn't matter!” Ianto steps in. “It's not an STI! We need a blood test to establish if Jack's my grandfather!”

Owen shuts up and stares wide eyed at Ianto.

“Just, don't ever bring it up again, or I will destroy you,” Ianto threatens.

“Shit! That's fucking crazy!”

“I know,” says Ianto, “just do that goddamn test so we can know!”

“Okay,” Owen says and he immediately goes to get the equipment out of the drawers. Ianto and Jack sit on the table, next to each other, but not touching. Jack is heartbroken that this might be the end. If it's positive, then Ianto will never let him touch him again. Ianto won't even look over at him, just sits stoically, staring at the wall straight ahead as Owen takes a blood sample. Jack keeps looking at him, trying to will him to look at him, but it doesn't work. As soon as Owen is done with him, Ianto jumps off the table and heads up the stairs. Jack waits for Owen to take his blood.

“Is this really a possibility?” Owen asks Jack quietly.

“Yeah, it seems so.” Jack mumbles.

“Sorry, mate,” Owen says. “That sucks. What are you going to do if it's positive?”

“I don't know,” Jack says. “I don't want to talk about it.”

Owen stops asking questions and finishes taking the blood sample. Jack immediately starts up the steps and Owen calls after him, “It'll only take about an hour on this machine. I'll let you know as soon as it's ready.”

Jack goes to his office, but Ianto isn't there. He checks the CCTV and eventually finds him in the archives. Jack decides to leave him alone as he obviously doesn't want to talk to Jack right now. He tries to do paperwork but can't seem to read anything and actually remember it. He keeps sneaking looks at Ianto on the CCTV cameras, and after forty minutes, he realizes that Ianto has apparently been working on the same form the entire time. He likely can't do any work either.

Finally, Jack hears Owen come up to the office. “Jack, get Ianto, and you both can come down to the med bay now. Results are ready.”

Owen leaves without waiting for an answer. Jack gets his com unit and calls down to Ianto, telling him just as tersely that Owen is ready to give results. Jack waits for Ianto to come up to the main Hub and then calls out to him before he turns towards the med bay. “Ianto, can you come in here for just a second.”

Ianto doesn't look like he wants to. “I think we should go get the results. Don't you?”

“I need to talk to you first,” he says.

Ianto reluctantly goes up the steps to the office. “I don't think there's anything to discuss until we know for sure.”

“Please,” Jack begs. Ianto goes inside the office and stands near the door. Jack closes the door and stands near him, not wanting the desk between them. “In case it's positive, I know you won't let me be with you anymore, even though it wouldn't change my feelings about you, so I just want this last moment with you, when it could still be negative. Can I, can I hold you?” Ianto looks up at him and sees that there's tears falling. Ianto's resolve crumbles at Jack's despair, and he slowly nods. Jack wraps his arms around him and squeezes him tight, burying his nose in Ianto's neck and smelling him, possibly for the last time. He wants to memorize the feel of him and the smell of him. Eventually, Ianto also puts his arms around Jack's waist and squeezes just a little bit. Jack swears that he hears Ianto smelling him, too.

Finally, Jack lets go and pulls away, trying to hide his face from Ianto. “Okay, let's go in.” Jack opens the door and walks away, leaving Ianto to slowly trail behind him, questioning whether or not he could really stay away from Jack.

They enter the med bay and see Owen lounging down there. “Took you long enough. I would have thought that you two would have been running down here, or does it really not matter to you if you're related.”

“Just tell us the results,” Ianto says impatiently.

“Fine, they're right here.” He picks up a folder of papers. “They indicate that Jack is indeed your grandfather.”

Jack feels his heart falling down through his body. Ianto's legs wobble like he's about to collapse. Jack reaches out to catch him, but Ianto pulls away. “No, Jack. Just, no. Please don't tell me about how we can still be together and that it doesn't matter. It matters to me, and I can't be near you anymore.”

“No, Ianto, please. At least let's talk about it.”

“No! You're just going to make this harder and make me do things that I think are wrong!”

Jack starts crying openly now. “Please, Ianto, I can't take this as the end of us.”

“Jack, you've had a lot of lovers. Just accept that this is one more gone.”

“Jesus, that's cold hearted!” Owen sputters out.

“It's not your business, Owen!” Ianto shouts at him.

“It is actually, because I'm really regretting this now.”

“Regretting what?” Jack asks.

“Well, this is not what I expected, honestly, but I was fucking with you. It's negative,” Owen says, handing the folder to Jack.

Jack is too emotional to fully process a turnabout like this, so he opens the folder and looks inside. He compares the DNA charts and sees for himself that there isn't any familial markers. He looks up in open mouthed shock at Owen. 

When Ianto sees this, he understands that Jack has verified that they are not related. “You complete arse!” Ianto shouts. “What the hell do you think you're doing fucking with us like that!”

“How could you do that, Owen?” Jack asks. “You're our doctor and our friend.”

Owen looks chagrined. “Honestly, I thought it would be funny.”

“Funny!” Jack grabs Owen by the shirt and shoves him against the wall. 

“I really didn't think you guys would take it so hard.”

Jack nearly spits at Owen. “You made us think everything was over between us, that I had lost the man I love, just for a laugh!?”

“I really do regret it now,” Owen pleads.

“Love?” Ianto asks quietly from behind him. 

Jack turns around and lets go of Owen. “Yes.” Jack says to Ianto, walking towards him.

“I love you, too,” Ianto replies. “It was killing me that... well, you know.”

“You're my boyfriend, Ianto. As long as you'll have me, I'll stay with you.”

Ianto kisses Jack, pulling him close for full contact. Jack relishes that he's holding Ianto again. Owen restrains himself from making any snide comments, feeling lucky to have gotten away with his life just now.

Jack pulls back from the kiss and places his hand on Ianto's cheek, looking into his eyes. “You do have his eyes, you know. You could only be his because you have his eyes.”

“They're just blue eyes, Jack, nothing special around here.”

“I'd like to celebrate you being my boyfriend. Can we go out to dinner tonight? Someplace special.”

“I'd like that.”

“I'll arrange everything.” Jack spends more time just looking at Ianto.

“I could use a cup of calming tea before getting to work,” Ianto says. “It's been a bit of an emotional roller coaster.”

“Me, too.”

“Then, later, um, I think I'd like to celebrate privately before tonight,” Ianto says, smiling shyly.

“I think that can be arranged,” Jack says with a grin.

Owen restrains more comments and doesn't dare even breathe loudly as they walk out of the med bay.


End file.
